Old EA Message Board

Hi Eos,

No need to apologize!

What you listed seems to be "on the right track" relative to your North Node and its ruler in the Eleventh House. Remember thou, it´s not only what we do but also how we do things, the mental and emotional attitudes we have. In your case with the Pluto Polarity Point in the Fourth House, I would suggest to nurture the emotional body, to learn not to pay too much attention to the objectives and achievements but also to the emotional content and quality of your emotions in your daily life while pursuing your goals.

The current transit of Pluto entering the Third House and in trine to natal Pluto, with a Scorpio Ascendent and Pluto also sextile Chiron in the Fourth House, can be a time of new growth that is progressive in its nature and is also an ideal time to learn about yourself, your deep motivations and to progressively eliminate any limiting factors to your evolution.  Also there is the potential to heal or deal with family issues or emotional wounds and to deepen your own emotional expression, which will contribute to the Pluto Polarity Point and your intended evolutionary path.

If you want to formulate any questions feel free do to so.

All the best

Remember thou, it´s not only what we do but also how we do things, the mental and emotional attitudes we have. In your case with the Pluto Polarity Point in the Fourth House, I would suggest to nurture the emotional body, to learn not to pay too much attention to the objectives and achievements but also to the emotional content and quality of your emotions in your daily life while pursuing your goals.


Excellent! I appreciate your feedback, Skywalker. Objectives are crucial but the way I feel about them is the reason I even engage in the activity to begin. When I am on the trail of some discovery I am enthralled, totally taken up by it. I love it. "Why?" is the most often asked question dropping from my lips... then next is "How?" I investigate to find the why of a topic in most all scenarios, that is where my mind goes and I feel a gratified sense of arrival, achievement of the goal, when I get it. Of course, the answer can often lead to more questions, so I keep going until I must up and off to work or some other necessary endeavor.

This has happened in personal relationships as well.... Not the "getting bored" part (although that has occurred in the past) I am intrigued by another's motivations. In fact, I believe that at times the motivations behind another's actions are more crucial than the actual outcome of their actions... sometimes.

I am invigorated by my studies in all areas, happy to be learning. When I feel I am not learning, I am less energized, bored, prone to irritations. I was very much in this space in my previous employment. And I am so grateful to be in a place now where I must investigate daily. Eventually, I feel that I will need to be self employed.

So when you say I will need to focus less on overall objectives more on the emotional satisfaction of my daily pursuits, I feel they are tied together. For example: I have a very large extended family. I come from 3 total, my sister, my brother, myself. We each have three children and they all are grown and have significant others. I do taxes for all who need them done. At that point, it is about 15 sets of taxes each year, sometimes more, sometimes less. This is a very busy time of year for me. I do this service for my extended family because of the love I feel for them and I am gratified to be able to do so. I am so grateful I have this talent to help them in an area where it can be a very confusing and frustrating subject.  Even more importantly, I feel much satisfaction in getting as much of their hard earned money back to them as the law will allow. This is very satisfying for me as I believe taxation to be another form of slavery. It is ridiculous that we are taxed on what we earn, then taxed again when we spend it in any way. Repulsive chicanery, in my humble opinion. So I feel very satisfied to help my loved ones through the maze designed to decimate their gains from their hard work. I don't really charge them, but ask that they help me with things I  may need through the year, like if I move house or maybe pick something up from town on their way for me, et cetera. I also feel very happy to help the ones who are so young with no concept of how or why this system works and try to teach them as we go through each year. Those who want to learn are happy, those who don't are just glad their money is coming back.

Yesterday, my 2nd son's longtime girlfriend, asked me to teach her how I do her taxes. She is an art student in her 3rd year of college and I have done her taxes for these years. She has been in the family for about 6-7 years. We were able to find an hour to sit down together, going over her details. I love this girl like my own daughter. Being an Art Major, she is doing what I was unable to do with my life. She is a thrift shopper, fashion and interior designer, as well as a painter and it is my very favorite thing to be near her because we love the same things. We are cut from the same cloth and it is no wonder that my son loves her. She is also the oldest child of two divorced seriously semi-dysfunctional parents, with a younger brother and sister. She takes care of everything, working so hard for the family business. We have an affinity and I am grateful to be able to help this young lady in any way I can, to contribute to her success. This is why I work on this for her and the rest of those I love.

So yes, my goals, objectives and emotions are intimately intertwined. How I feel about them is why I have them, my motivation for them. I love that my North Node is in Gemini in the 8th, doing the detailed work of taxes for my siblings and the younger people... it couldn't get more poetic.


Questions:
~How do you see this Pluto Trine Pluto in Sextile to Chiron Return Opposing natal Pluto, as the natal Pluto Polarity Point finishing out here this year?

~Do you see the South Node of Pallas Athena being visible here in this configuration in the manifestation? I know Pallas is about thinking, the Left Brain eschewing the emotional side for the goal driven, warrior princess, thinker, but I am wondering, is this the reason for your warning?

~It is ridiculous to me to only just now have rediscovered the import of this period... the Transiting Pluto Square Uranus has its midpoint exactly on my natal Saturn at 29Aquarius14'. It would appear that this is a major reason for the all of the hardships of this recent few years. I know I had seen it coming, some time back and had discussed it with my then fiancé, but had forgotten about it until just going over my chart today... crazy.

Thank you again for contributing your valued view and experience!
eos


eta: spelling errors and redundancies

Hi Eos,

I wasn´t warning you but reminding you that since you have a Tenth House Pluto, you may place much of your attention on the job, social status etc, due to unconscious security needs but, that the Polarity Point actually indicates an evolutionary need of being secure from within. Essentially to redefine the self image from the inside out, to deepen and enrich the inner life in a variety of ways, to relax the emotional body and accept the self simply as is, Pisces, and depending on evolutionary level and personal desires of course, to create a relationship to the Source itself for security on an ultimate level.

I see a potential deepening of your perception with Pluto trine Pluto and also a potential time of empowerment as you learn about yourself and have the ability to regenerate in some areas of your life. As I stated prior, you can progressively eliminate personal limitations which can lead to a sense of renewal and a shedding of the old in a non cataclysmic way in which you feel a kind of smooth progress on a deep level, Pluto. The continuation of a maturation process in which you are defining what you desire your future to be like and testing yourself and the structures in your life for what is actually really possible thus, also continuing to define your own personal reality with Saturn currently square itself. Also possibly more personal responsibilities with your family or home as Saturn squares itself back and forth this year.

To me the themes of empowerment, renewal, regeneration, healing, maturation and a deepening of your emotional self and perception seem to be the themes with the mentioned transits and the Chiron return in your Fourth House. Forgiveness of self and others may also be a a necessity in order to deepen the emotional expression in your life and deepen the ability to nurture yourself and others. These transits can correlate to a time when old wounds may surface in order to let go of them and carry on with your personal journey in a lighter way. The Chiron return indicating a new cycle in which you can leave behind old emotional wounded content you do not need anymore, combine this with the Pluto trine to itself, ruling the Ascendent, and the picture I get is one of moving forward with renewed energy and becoming lighter and wiser while also becoming more mature and  also healing, if you desire to go thru your personal processes and look deeply within.

I would say that the South Node of Pallas is part of the wounding you may be carrying from the past into the present life as it is conjunct Chiron and may give clues on an archetypal level into the nature of those wounds and to any healing that may be necessary.

One could look at the midpoint you suggested but in EA we don´t use them. You had some intense and life changing transits these past few years correlating primarily with transiting Uranus square Pluto aspecting your Sun and also transiting Saturn which was up and down over your Ascendent when you separated and then square your Venus when your mother passed away, only to retrograde back and station on your natal Neptune last summer. 

All the best

Hello Eos,


MERCURY RETROGRADE AQUARIUS 2015 ~ ☿ Rx


5 Jan - 1 Aquarius 18 - Mercury Enters Rx Zone
21 Jan - 17 Aquarius 05 Rx - Mercury Stationary Retrograde
11 Feb - 1 Aquarius 18 - Mercury Stationary Direct
3 Mar - 17 Aquarius 05 - Mercury Leaves Rx Zone


Now that Mercury is Direct, would you like to report on any intense revelations, sudden awakenings, breaking from the past, final answers or evolutionary lessons that are pouring in?


Thanks,

Linda

Hello Eos,


TRANSITS FOR MARCH 2015


Wow ~ what a month March is going to be with:


-  Jupiter trine Uranus in the first week,


-  Yod:  Sun - Pluto - Jupiter (apex) on 3-7 March,


-  Full Moon at 14 deg Virgo on 5th March,


-  Venus, Mars and Uranus in Aries conjunct the South Node and squaring Pluto in Capricorn,


-  the 7th and final Pluto/Uranus exact square at 15 deg Aries/Capricorn on 16-17 March,


-  a New Moon Solar Eclipse at 29 deg Pisces on 20th March 2015,


-  Yod:  Mercury - Pluto - Jupiter on 21-23 March, and


-  Grand Trine:  Pluto, Venus and Black Moon Lilith at the end of the month.


The New Moon Solar Eclipse will square your Nodes in Sagittarius/Gemini creating "temporary skipped steps."


Temporary skipped step - transiting Nodal Axis or planet

[Example: Transiting Jupiter in Aries/11th house squaring natal South Node in Capricorn/8th house, North Node in Cancer/2nd house] If a planet forms a square to the natal Nodal Axis it reflects that the specific planetary function (by house and sign locality) will act/serve as a skipped step for the duration of that transit in the context of the current evolutionary/karmic intentions symbolized by the natal South and North Nodes. For example, when Jupiter was in Aries/in my 11th house (which is also the polarity point of my natal Pluto) squaring my natal axis of South Node in Capricorn/8th house and North Node in Cancer/2nd house I experienced a transiting skipped step in the context of the need to assert/develop autonomy and independence and express my unique individuality in regards to new teachings I had learned (Jupiter in Aries/11th house) that facilitated the need to become inwardly secure and self-reliant (North Node in Cancer/2nd house) and how it conflicted with my existing obligations and responsibilities at an existing university (South Node in Capricorn/8th house) which did not allow the new teachings I had learned to be assimilated/taught in an independent manner. The key point within this is that I needed to adjust my interpretation (Jupiter) of my personal experience at that time and to be willing to break free from my existing obligations/responsibilities in order to peruse a new path that was in alignment with the teachings that promoted the ability to become inwardly secure, self-reliant, and reflected the development of my new identity in this context. Again, the skipped step was regarding my own interpretation/teachings that were assimilated and my ability to develop a life path that reflects my natural truth/voice independent from previous social conditioning/man-made teachings I had absorbed from the evolutionary past (transiting Jupiter in Aries/11th house squaring natal South Node in Capricorn/8th house, North Node in Cancer/2nd house).

If the transiting nodal axis is square a natal planet the specific dynamics symbolized by the nodal axis (by house and sign locality) then the current dynamics that are linked with the transition from past (transiting South Node) to future (transiting North Node) act/serve as a skipped step in terms of the natal squaring planet. In other words, the transiting Nodal Axis symbolizes where our past meets our future, so to speak, and that those specific dynamics are now acting as skipped steps in the context of the natal planet. Again the transiting Nodes symbolize the evolutionary movement/integration from past to future in the current time while the natal Nodal Axis reflects the ongoing transition from the evolutionary past to future throughout the life. (Deva)


Please let us know if you would like to share any events throughout the month.


Thanks so much,

Linda

[size=10pt]...reminding you that since you have a Tenth House Pluto, you may place much of your attention on the job, social status etc, due to unconscious security needs but, that the Polarity Point actually indicates an evolutionary need of being secure from within. Essentially to redefine the self image from the inside out, to deepen and enrich the inner life in a variety of ways, to relax the emotional body and accept the self simply as is, Pisces, and depending on evolutionary level and personal desires of course, to create a relationship to the Source itself for security on an ultimate level.
[/size]


Hello All!!!

It has been a very trying and yet exhilarating time these last few weeks... very busy, indeed!

Regarding the copied text above from Skywalker, this idea of keeping a strong & sane internal compass- strengthening my emotional foundation- has been manifest through the whole of this job transition. Although it has been quite challenging & I have found myself floundering in some moments, I have repeatedly referenced my true center, navigating some significantly difficult issues in taking over this office position, consistently taking the high road. I have been not so subtly threatened in many ways & held true to my self worth, allowing my integrity to speak for itself, which is much to my credit given the nature of these situations.

My retiring trainer, the woman I am replacing, has been exceedingly difficult in sharing information regarding job tasks. I have had what would ostensibly appear to be ample time to train... yet, embarrassingly, I still have questions regarding some procedures. This is due~ in no small part~ to receiving procedural documents only last week, in my 5th week of training. I have been beyond frustrated and am receiving insults from a few quarters regarding this perceived lack on my part. When asking questions to gain clarity throughout my training, I have been interrupted, misdirected and generally confounded by the actual goals of this person and the apparent disparity from what anyone would believe they should be. An example being, I ask the question: So, if I understand you correctly, A+B=C? I am met with the answer of an emphatic, "No! (virtually shouted so that any ears down the hall may deduce that I am an imbecile) then explained in many round about phrases so that in the end, yes, A+B does indeed = C.

I have had other office staff avoid meeting my eyes, others when meeting my eyes give me disparaging glances or even rolling eyes when offering input...

To wit: While discussing a problem of the counting of an inventory item consistently coming to an overage by about 20 pounds for the last 2 weeks, I suggested the obvious that the scale was off. Both my trainer and the production manager barely glanced my way but met each others eyes and mildly smirked.
Later, still seeking the "answer" I reiterated that the scale should be checked for accuracy. I enlarged on my statement, never the shy retiring type, to state that he could simply step on the scale to verify. The production manager snidely stated that his weight would not be a controlled measurement and therefore unacceptable to provide an answer. I rejoined that, "... it need not be a controlled data, merely somewhere in the ball park, as I am sure you are aware of your approximate weight & if it is off by about 20 lbs, you have your answer."
Well, about an hour later, this manager comes to my trainer and myself and says, "I solved the problem!" To which my trainer replies that she knew he would, asking what was the issue? He states that he discerned that the scale was mis-calibrated... duh.    do ya think?!?

Anyway, I have kept my head up, kept hard at work learning everything I possibly can & have been able to prove myself in many ways when the occasion arises despite the setups and mis-directions of the trainer. Eventually, I will be able to let my worth and my work stand for itself and despite the fact that I start wit this new company behind the 8 ball, it will all come clear eventually.

more soon...

Hello Eos!


Thanks for sharing the details of the first few weeks in your new position.

So, the first thing we ask in EA is, Why is the Soul creating this situation?  Since any symbol in the birth chart can only be understood within the context of your primary/evolutionary karmic axis, it seems to me that your Pluto in Virgo in the 10th house is right on cue!!

The following quotes are from Jeffrey Wolf Green's EA Glossary:


Pluto polarity point - 4th house (or Cancer)

The person must learn to develop internal security and sense of identity not bound up in the social position or role. They are also learning emotional lessons. They commonly receive shocks delivered by parents, children, or spouse. For example, the death of a parent, or having judgmental parents. The necessity is for self-examination. The shocks force deep self-examination. This helps them understand the nature and basis of their emotions, and to create the necessary sense of inner security not tied to social function. Problems experienced through their own children can force self-examination as never before. Sometimes they may neglect their own children due to career obligations and never get to know them. This can produce guilt, leading to self-examination. Sometimes the desired social position is denied to enforce the lessons. Other times this can happen due to previous abuses of power. Being held down again forces the self-examination.

The reflection gradually causes them to form a new self-image not dependent on career or anything external. They begin to develop an attitude that even if they lose everything, they will still be okay. As they develop these attitudes, the roadblocks to the social position will be released. They can then achieve the social recognition they desire. They learn to balance work time with private time. They learn that their values are subjective, and apply to them alone. They learn to not judge others. They learn to fulfill their ambitions in non-manipulative ways and encourage others to do the same. They learn to become responsible parents.


Pluto polarity point - Pisces (or 12th house)

The intent is simplification, dissolving old barriers that prevent the understanding of the individual's self-concept. It shows the person that they are part of a larger force, a realization that begins to fill the existential hole left by the popping of the Leo balloon of ego. Many will deny a cosmic connection, dismissing it as impractical or irrational. There is a tendency to embrace spirituality during a crisis and to abandon it when the crisis ends, until the next crisis. Pisces facilitates the development of the holistic, intuitive approach to life, to counter Mercury's left brained logical orientation. Becoming aware of the connection to Divinity fosters self-forgiveness, and appreciation of the imperfections in others. The holistic view helps develop inner peace that puts the worrying mind at rest. They come to see the work function that is best aligned with their true purpose rather than working any old job. These people are natural karma yogis, serving God through the work and service that they perform. Those who resist can live lives of pain, illness, and a sense of being imprisoned. Those who follow the intent will surrender to the spirit and transform. They will be quite humble and serve anyone who truly needs their help. Those who go from resistance to surrender and back again will alternate between times of great clarity and times of crisis and discouragement. These people have keen minds, are self-effacing, willing to help others, naturally timid, self-conscious, critical or forgiving of others depending on the circumstances, always busy, dealing with endless crises, good organizational skills.


~ ~ ~


A few thoughts:

I find it interesting that the very thing we don't want to happen, happens!  This is because we are here to learn our lessons through those very dynamics that can be painful and that are sometimes avoided.  It could be that you desire - via Pluto-Uranus-Venus-Part of Fortune in Virgo in the 10th, Leo ruling the MC, Sun in Libra 11th, and your Pluto polarity point in Pisces - to create reasonable harmony within "the dream job."  I have learned that since the PPP is such a new area, that mistakes can be made.  It could be said that you have suffered disillusionment because the uncooperative workmates are certainly pushing you to emotional extremes!!  We should also look to your 6th house to understand your relationship with workmates in general.

Your 6th house is ruled by Mars in Leo in the 9th house.  Who is boss here?    Here you come in direct contact with patriarchal distortions in the workplace.  Since Mars works closely with Pluto - all desires really coming from the Soul itself - then Mars is very important as it provides the fuel and energy that works to fulfill the Soul's desires.  Honesty would be very important for you, and you probably expect it from others in the workplace too.  Your Moon in Cancer in the 9th house is in a very auspicious position conjunct the North Node of Pluto (for you and everyone on the planet!):  dishonesty would certainly create an emotional reaction!  The Soul desires to work directly on evolving the egocentric structure in this lifetime as well as the current egocentric structure working directly on evolving the Soul itself - they evolve together - your Moon conjunct the North Node of Pluto.  (Actually your Moon is exactly conjunct my Moon in Cancer in the 9th! but this is not about me   )

So, why is the Soul creating these situations that are driving you nuts, yet you are able to keep your Leonine cool, self-respect and dignity on the job.  I see that you have the South Node of Chiron (the wounded healer) in Taurus in the 6th house, that interacts with the current life Chiron Pisces 4th conjunct the PPP, and the North Node of Chiron Libra 12th in order to advance healing potentials/resources for yourself and the collective.  Just in the Chirotic trinity alone, the water element is repeated several times, bringing opportunities for evolution via the emotions.  Chiron is conjunct your PPP:


Pluto polarity point - conjunct planet

Development of the planet conjunct the Pluto polarity point, by house and sign, is a crucial part of the Soul's ongoing evolutionary process. It's one of the most intense placements a planet can have. Review what Jeffrey had to say about Mars opposing Pluto and how extreme that is. Now substitute for the Mars archetypes that he described, the archetypes of the planet that is opposing Pluto. One thing that can often occur with this placement is people and events in the outer reality will occur in intense Plutonian ways. The person often sees this as external, as things that are happening to them. They have forgotten that everything that occurs externally is an out-picturing of the Soul's internal reality. Thus they can feel victimized, until they finally come to understand the evolutionary reasons these intense experiences have been necessary for the Soul's ongoing evolutionary needs. Then the lights start coming on. In the potential lack of awareness of external reality reflecting internal reality, the person may "own" one side of the opposition and project the other. That is one way it could play out. They would be projecting the parts they could not own. (Steve)


From the above, I am able to gauge "why" the Soul has created such emotional upheaval in your first weeks on the job.

You say:  "I will be able to let my worth and my work stand for itself . . ."  I'm sure you will!  Good luck!  

I would be interested in reading your astrological correlations to what you have shared.

Looking forward to your next update.


Thanks so much!

Linda

Dear Linda & All,

I have been having a very exciting time since reading your last post. So exciting to have my first grandchild, a new grandson born 3/8/15 at 5:14am in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

He came with much difficulty, had his head stuck for hours & had to be suctioned out because he was too deeply wedged for a C-section. I feel that this is shown by Pluto just past the Ascendant into the 12th, but blessedly there was no pain for his mother, despite the waning square of the Moon to Pluto. He was taken right away due to distress & kept in the NICU for about 3 days afterwards. He is beautiful, robust & healthy, 21" log & 8.8Lbs. A 29Cap Ascendant & 24Scorpio Midheaven, with Pluto conjunct Ceres squaring his Nodes as the North Nodal Skipped Step, Mars, Uranus & Venus on the South Node, Moon on the North Node... this promises to be quite a lifetime! His Mother's Mars is at 13Cancer, the missing leg of this ponderous T-Square. His Father's Moon is on Junior's South Node. He is also born 1 week before his father's birthday with the Sun, Venus & Mars in the same placements. He is already showing a marked comfort with his father's care & he looks exactly like his mother

Friday, March 6th, marked the last day of "training" with the woman who retired. Since this day, there have been many, many instances of just how poor that training was. These issues have been brought to light for the plant manager & he has seen the need for greater input... having previously professed personal pride in being a "hands-off" type of "macro-manager", he is now having to become involved in things that were her strictly domain. This is uncomfortable for everyone concerned, but we are steadily working through it. Things are improving daily and I am grateful for my years in gaining maturity and patience.

Additionally, there is the distinct tenor of an "us versus them" mentality in the workplace, as well as finger pointing, back-biting & outright stabbing. I am finding that I have to document all information after conversations, as well, not only in our plant but further infection on the international scale. This is quite out of line with how I see my life progressing.

In other words, this is stinking, reeking shit, plain & simple & I do not play, nor work well, in the shit. Now some may say that I enjoy the gloss of my Neptunian Ascendant's rose-colored glasses too much & that all work environments are the same. I do not agree. I believe that we are the agents of the changes that we would like to see in this world and my vision of a happy, productive cooperative is well within reach if enough people catch the same sweet scent.

So, as per your definitions and insight above, I am gracious and keeping my head up & my tongue surreptitiously bit. There was an instance late yesterday when I did not keep it between my teeth & feel that even that small, irritated protest was beneath me. So I have devised another method of answering this issue to be implemented next Monday.

Today, I am babysitting my great niece & great nephew, as their father is in the National Guard, on duty.

So, in reading further an article on Gray Astrology bringing together the cycles converging at this time which speaks directly to the last 5 years of my life...

Quoting:
This face thus contains heights of agony and ecstasy.  The pain of betrayal results from investing in the wrong ideal, mistaking the face of the beloved. The eagerness to enact the romantic quest can lead one to overlook whether the situation in fact warrants it. If those who roam this decan are to be spared repeated disappointments, they must learn to discriminate.  Yet even the most discriminating will see some dreams shatter, some sacrifices rendered vain . . . The third face of Pisces, the last of the decans, looks always to the end, the ultimate meaning of the entire cycle.  Moros [daimon of doom] whispers that it is pointless, and that the wheel of incarnation is merely a cruel carnival ride.  In argument, Elpis [daimon of hope] points to beauty, love and the real possibility of happy endings.  (p. 259-260)

I am not about worldly status, gain nor money... more about brotherly love shared throughout the World. As easy as it is for me to see the & beautiful hearts of others, it has been that much less so to recognize the base & ugly in those same others. This is a lessen I have been learning. Another is to love them anyway.

I see this reflected in my chart clearly through the 16 Scorpio Neptune, 15 Pisces Chiron, 19 Cancer Moon trine, forming the Kite to the Pluto Uranus conjunction at 14 & 12 Virgo.  I also see that Hygeia is more perfection of this configuration being conjunct my Moon from 14 Cancer... recently having been opposed by the Pluto Transit. The key is obviously to learn an impersonal love.

I am doing very well here

Love eos

Hi Linda, I am sad to hear the disheartened tone in your note.. I really believe that your idea & plan has so much merit & value for everyone. I can tell you that i feel exactly the same about the lack of involvement from others. I have so many experiences & am seriously working in my "lessons" but from inside the mirror it is difficult. I have been striving, persevering. I have many questions. So many, but the ones I have asked have gone unanswered to the point where I could make use of them... Possibly I would have to be much more open & revealing to get to the meat of the matter than I am comfortable being... Perhaps this has caused my communication to be too vague for clarity on the judgement or diagnostic end... To achieve "graduation" in my lessons, I am striving to understand how to either grow beyond, elude or avoid the recurring theme in my life of:
1) asshole male figure, controlling, dominating & denigrating
2) who uses the other women in the vicinity to carry out some of this behaviour & effect
3) causing me to feel alone, attacked without support in whatever scenario is playing out be it:
A) in grade school, my father away always, leaving me to care for my needy mother, my sister & brother
b) in mid school, nasty mean girls attacking me
C) in late teens & early 20s, either physically or emotionally abusive boyfriends, screwing every one of my girlfriends, again leaving me alone
D) ex husband, alcoholic, emotionally controlling, removed me far from family then began major control games using his daughters & sisters to treat me terribly, facing grade school shit all over again
E) and now my current boss... Far less of a problem & far less personal, for sure.

I asked this question on the thread, in far less detail but enough to say: this is the theme, what the hell am I supposed to learn from it?
Sky walkers reply was to be less involved with my social standing & career... In all honesty, it would hard to find someone much less career/status focused than myself. Focus on family is what I was told... But it has been my complete life to focus on family. I am at a loss.

Obviously the theme repeats to teach the lesson. But I can't see it.

Another part of this theme is in the thick of these things (asshole men, crappy women) there always appears some form of sexual effrontery, not necessarily from the parties involved, but as a side note.

Most recently, a dearly remembered friend from high school popped up out of the blue on Facebook. We messages back & forth thru this messenger... Then last week, I don't know how, but he sent a disgusting sexually deviant message to my personal email through his cell phone. I have blocked him but don't know why any of that would occur. Pretty shocked to tell the truth. I told my sister, who also remembered this friend so fondly. She was shocked & also asks the question: why is there a creep target on my forehead & how do I get rid of it?

I'll write more later

Greetings everyone reading our remaining volunteer thread!


Eos and I have discussed the continuance of this thread, and we both agree that it would be worthwhile to keep it open for people to read, comment or ask questions.

We have, however, deleted the Bio as it contains too much personal information.  The chart remains though. 

Here is some feedback from one of our esteemed EA Astrologers as to WHY the Volunteer project slowed down:

"I think it was a good idea, but a public message board is a hard place and format for some people to open up.  Both sides." 

This thread will remain open as it is still a valuable learning experience for those new to EA.

Eos has graciously agreed to be available to send further feedback for you, for your EA learning.

As always, please feel free to comment, ask questions, or join in at any time. 


Thank you so much!


Love,

Linda