Couples age gap

[Sree]

Hi All,

Presently in our society marriage occurs between partners of almost the same age or with less age gap.And in it especially man will be older than woman (based on Indian context) ,but there are cases where significant age difference between partners exist and also woman been older than man.And my question is as evolution is based on individual pace of soul growth,is it natural that people with significant age gap " get attracted" (as partners), because of soul connection based on past life memory as been partners , especially to work out their evolutionary and karmic needs .I understand that evolutionary lesson in relation can be learned even without been in  relation ( being a partner),but again by taking sexuality as a natural law ,being in relation in the above told manner (significant age gap)is natural or not.When i write "get attracted" what i mean is that the souls now feels,after many life time with difference in pace of soul growth and the problems they face in relation , that they are ready with same conscious level or vibration to have a healthy relation- but with significant age gap .

Example Ivan Krasko and Natalia Shevel, Agatha Christie and  Sir Max Mallowan

Thank you
Sree

[Skywalker]

Hi Sree,

To me it´s natural that there can be big age gaps between partners. If there was love from a prior life connection then it´s normal that the love will be sustained in the current life, regardless of age or gender.

There can also be other reasons that some people are attracted to younger or older partners, some may be natural reasons and others distorted. In a distorted sense, how many times have we seen people marry much older people, primarily for material security?

All the best

[Rad]

Hi Sree,

Adding to what Skywalker has said we must also remember that this can occur, at times, when one or both Souls displaced emotions from their childhood relative to the parent(s) of origins. These displaced emotions from childhood then manifest in their adult lives by way of attracting younger and/or older partners for this reason.

God Bless, Rad

[Sunyata]

I'm not sure what is displaced for a man who is involved with a younger woman. If it's the mother then how does that manifest in a younger woman if the mother was an older figure?

Thanks,
Sunyata

[Sree]

Hi Skywalker,

There can also be other reasons that some people are attracted to younger or older partners, some may be natural reasons and others distorted. In a distorted sense, how many times have we seen people marry much older people, primarily for material security?

Which of this is a more evolved choice ? This is about a lady around age 35 , her husband was working in construction field( labour) and he was working in gulf region.Both of them where in first consensus stage and had two children age 5 and 10. The agent which hired him to work ,manipulated him by making him work for less pay and under drastic condition.And finally he die out of heart attack at a young age.And this lady didn't had a saving to carry her life forward ,and thus she need to work for making a living.But she was afraid (unconsciously) of the reality of patriarchy competitive world plus hierarchy and also afraid about her husband experience . But life situation provided her with a choice to marry a older (widower) and she choosed it. Even though the act was for security based on money , it helped her raised the children in a better way.If she had chose to stand on her legs she would have suffer largely as a result of her less skill and resource plus patriarchy hierarchy .But by marring to a older person ( he was in a higher evolutionary state  ),she had a life which was evolving but in a steady manner.Even the choice to marry this older person really need huge emotional strength as it is not a accepted way of marriage for consensus.So my question is that the choice she made to marry this old man even for the security of money is more evolved decision  or not - especially after the marriage the growth for his lady is very prominent.That is she stood as a candidate in local body election and won it etc.Looks like she is getting more independent.So can we take every case which in the surface level looks like a decision done for security through money as distorted or is it more like a necessity for evolution to occur .

Hi Rad,

When one have such a displaced emotion from childhood, the lesson is to find it within ,but many would fail to find it from within,so they may initiate relation as told above to find it.So my question is if there is displaced emotion from childhood and he is unable to find it within , then which is the natural way to evolve - 1 .suppress it as long as you find it within. 2 . initiate relation and from that dynamics grow - thinking the soul to be in consensus level.

Thank you
Sree

[Skywalker]

Hi Sree,

To me it´s totally natural that a single mother in need would look to find support and security with a partner or others in any way necessary. What isn´t natural is when someone pretends to love someone for power, status and money. And it is the patriarchy and the domination of the world resources, the way people are grouped together, dependent on a distorted monetary system that excludes so many, that is essentially distorted and thus also distorts human relationships.

I am no one to judge the situation of the person you are speaking about. I simply think that the natural reasons for people to commit to one another in a marriage would be for love and enjoyment of the other and the desire to grow in various ways through being a partner to them, share life and potentially have a family with that person.

All the best

[Rad]

Hi Sree,

"When one have such a displaced emotion from childhood, the lesson is to find it within ,but many would fail to find it from within,so they may initiate relation as told above to find it.So my question is if there is displaced emotion from childhood and he is unable to find it within , then which is the natural way to evolve - 1 .suppress it as long as you find it within. 2 . initiate relation and from that dynamics grow - thinking the soul to be in consensus level."

************

The evolutionary/ karmic 'lesson' if for the Soul to understand WHY it has created such conditions in childhood for itself. Those reasons can of course be many, not just one reason for all. If a Soul does this, of itself, it leads to emotional/ psychological maturation because of taking responsibility for one's own life. This emotional/psychological maturation then because the cause, inner cause, to not choose external partners that are a reflection of those displaced emotions from childhood.

Without doing this, or until this is done, the Soul will keep repeating the psychological/ emotional dynamics defined by that displacement with partner after partner.

God bless, Rad

[Wei]

I'm not sure what is displaced for a man who is involved with a younger woman. If it's the mother then how does that manifest in a younger woman if the mother was an older figure?

Thanks,
Sunyata

Hi Sunyata, i could think one of reason, the man is of course attracted to what he needs even unconciously, he could have displaced needs of not being nurtured in a way he needs by his mother, has anger towards mother, then attracted to a younger woman whose emotional dynamic is very similar to his mother, reflects why his mom has done this or that, in this intimate relationship, he would learn that his mom is just a little girl who also has displaced emothion needs never resolved even at very old age, by understanding that, he could start to forgive his mother and release those anger, and by forgiving he is healing his own displaced emotion needs, also if mom has been wounded in some way when he was a child (didn't have ability to protect his mom) he may be attracted to a younger woman to protect her, nurture her, i guess that's also a displaced need/guilt, that he wish he could have protect his mom? Hope that make sense?

[Sree]

Hi Sunyata,

Adding to what Wei has said  and what i think
When one have displaced emotion from  mother it may be a case where the mother wouldn't have "listen" to 'who he is "and thus didn't felt like being nurtured in the way he can feel it.When this man marries a younger woman ,this woman itself will have displaced emotion or wound, where she is looking for some  form of "protection".And to have this protection she is ready to follow this older man like a shadow ,listening to him fully(dependence).And when the young lady starts listening to him fully ,it may make this man feel that he is been "heard"(-which didn't happen when he was a child) .

Thank you
Sree

[jaydenc]

my hubby and i have a big age gap but hes still with it and we have made it work